Am I the world's biggest jerk?

I got on the train this morning and had a seat across from a middle aged woman. I had my longboard with me, and from the way she looked at me I thought she was annoyed. It turns out she was just excited to have some company!



"So, what's the point of those longboards? Are you trying to simulate snowboarding?" she said.

I mumbled something in response.

She continued, "That train over there is full of cars--automobiles. I can't figure out why people don't hijack those trains more often. I mean, I never would. I'm not of the particular...um...persuasion. But there's gotta be a couple million dollars worth of cars on there."

Despite the fact that I'm trying not to engage her, she continues to try and make conversation. As she droned on, I realized I needed to do something to make the pain stop. So, I pulled my headphones out of the backpack and slipped them on. Even though the other end wasn't connected to anything (I left it in the backpack), for all she knew it was plugged into some high-tech magical device that she would never understand. I did this mid sentence and she immediately stopped talking.

Remember this trick for the future, it just may save you. In fact, you don't even need headphones with a cord on them. Just get some old headphones and cut the cords. Crazy people will think it's some high end wireless doohicky. If they continue talking to you, just point to the headphones, shake your head slightly, and mouth the words "I can't hear you..."